When the Weather Outside is Frightful....

"I have good news and bad news"

"OK, give me the bad news first"

"We're out of toilet paper"

"WHAT?!? OK, so whats the good news?"

"I love you!"

The previous conversation was what Boyfriend told me in the midst of an ice storm that was falling over Western Pennsylvania last week. Driving was not an option, and since I am NEVER one to drip dry, we set out on our quest.

The gas station by Boyfriend's apartment is only up the road, but I'm sure it took us about 20 minutes to get there on foot. Ice was everywhere. Cars looked like M&M's. By this I mean that the car itself was the chocolate middle and the ice was the candy shell. The roads and the sidewalks we're all sheets of ice. Walking on the snow was a no-go, especially since this too was coated in ice, not to mention about 5 inches deep.

As I walked out of the apartment, I felt like Larry the Burglar from Home Alone when he tried to walk up the steps the the McCalister house. Even though I secured a death grip onto the railing, my legs were going everywhere. Then came the challenge of the sidewalk. It seemed that every step we took forward, we fell more steps backwards, and I couldn't help but sing the famous Paula Abdul song in my head the whole way.

Boyfriend had on what he called his "Ice Breakin' Boots", whose only purpose was to go stomping around in the snow while kicking it everywhere. Come to think of it, they really didn't even serve a purpose, except the purpose to annoy me.

Finally, we came to our destination and got our TP. I couldn't help but pick up a shit load of candy for myself, which included Junior Mints and Butterfingers that are two total RED LIGHT FOODS for me. If you were wondering, Red Light Foods for me consist of the foods that I could shove my face full of for days in and days out and not get sick of. Would I puke? Ya, probably. Would it stop me? Not so much. Puke and rally baby.

As for that 3 pounds I lost last week, I'm pretty sure that I put it back on plus some. Me thinks that in extreme cases such as this one, I should not be so much above the "drip dry" option.