Worst. Weekend. EVER!!! Part II

Saturday night was pretty uneventful being that Boyfriend got sick and I got the pleasure of listening to him hack up a lung all night instead of going out to dinner like I really wanted to. And the fun didn't end there.

We were both woken up at 4 in the morning by Cayden's cries. I knew what this meant. I tried to go back to sleep and pretend that I didn't hear anything, but I figured that was too cruel even for me. Doggy was covered in crap yet again. I held him out in front of me like the little infectious disease that he was, and took him outside so he could leave even more cowpies all over the sidewalk for people to step in.

This is when I found out that Boyfriend knows me too well. When I got back in the house, he had already cleaned up Cayden's crate for me. Lucky for him. I was on such a tirade that night that I probably would have suffocated him with a pillow if I came back in and saw that he was still in bed. Boyfriend is a good boyfriend, and I appreciate him.

After that ordeal, Boyfriend couldn't stop coughing so we watched some TV for about a half hour. As soon as we said we were going to bed, Cayden started shaking. He followed me into the bathroom, and proceeded to cover the bathroom floor in poo. I then got the pleasure of washing his ass for about the 135th time that week.

Sunday proved to be no different. After I brought in my groceries from the store, I thought it would be a good idea to take the dog for a walk while I was on the phone with Old College Roommate, totally neglecting the fact that I am THE most uncoordinated person in the world and a world renowned klutz.

I stepped in a hole in the sidewalk, rolled my ankle, and heard the worst cracking noises that still give me nightmares. The dog tried to run away from me (way to go Lassie) and I had to lunge to grab him. Now people, I cannot tell you how many times I have tripped, fell, or smacked myself in the head with something and have been able to escape without serious injury. It is absolutely HORRIFYING that I seriously screwed myself up because I was walking my dog and talking on the phone at the same time.

While this is going on OCR is still talking. I try to interrupt her about 3 times before she hears me.

Me: OCR, I think I really hurt myself.

OCR: What?!

Me: I stepped in a hole in the sidewalk and rolled my ankle. It made a loud cracking sound and now it hurts really bad!

OCR: *Loud Laughter* Aww Meggie, did you forget that you can't walk and chew gum the same time?

Me: Yes, and I don't know why I even tried to overstep my boundaries. I have to go now and try to hobble my way home.

Ya, I really f'ed up my ankle. It swelled to the size of a baseball and I even had to call of work on Monday because I couldn't walk on it. The thing that surprises me (or perhaps doesn't surprise me) is that when I tell someone about it, their first reaction is to laugh uncontrollably instead of asking me if I'm alright. I can feel the love.

Christmas is this weekend. Hopefully I will get my Tiffany's 10 Row Necklace and everything will be right with the world again.